Day 12: A Magic Show
It was about 5am when I rolled up to the property here in Wisconsin. The darkness, the unsure stillness of the country night grasps the imagination. I remember working on this house out here when there were tarps covering gaping holes in it's frame and when the termite infested wood quivered in the wind. The inside was nearly the same as the outside. Mosquitos feasted on you while you slept, snakes and rats and roaches and spiders, all seeming to be unaware that they weren't welcome crept through my abode. But who am I to tell nature where it is and isn't welcome.
As the winds howled and tore through halls racing up and down the stairs, every once and awhile I would, in my restless nature step out into the darkness and just gaze into the deep of the countryside. I imagined large beasts, wild and ferocious, sometimes maybe patient and observing looking back at me and I would think that there was nothing between me and them. My lone body standing as I often did completely alone for unknown distances around, peering out into a vast dark society where creatures continually stirred. It was terrifying. But I welcomed the feeling.
Now there is somewhat of a sense of security that this house is finished. In order for me to even get outside I have to maneuver a large and thorough security system that won't hesitate to send the police in a moments notice.
But still. It is a strange thing, the country. I was adventuring out around the property earlier today, taking in all the borders of our land. After thoroughly spraying myself down with mosquito and tic repellent I trekked across the fields and entered the woods. Not having my waders I steered clear of the swamp. The trees were my main focus.
Here I am on the move, in a different state nearly everyday trying to learn and make sense of my life, and then there are these trees, ever still and ever growing. They just stand there, take in the sun and spread their roots wherever they happen to be. I wonder if the trees engage in, unheard by human ears great theological discussion about where they came from and who they are. I can't say for certain that they don't, but I'm pretty sure they don't spend a great deal of time worrying about what to wear.
I found a good place to sit and I meditated for an hour or so. I tell you. You want to see a magic show. Go sit in nature for an hour. I mean just sit there doing nothing else. Not fishing, not hunting, or hiking even. Just be there. Things start to disappear. What starts to disappear, you ask? As simply as I can put it, things that are unimportant. And things that are quiet, that don't ask for attention or to be made into a spectacle start to materialize out of nowhere. Then a truth descends upon your mind as you realize that they've been there the whole time, silently growing, waiting, taking in the sun and just being the best that they can be wherever they are irrespective of all the trauma and horrendous things taking place all around them.
You know I would say that it's a good thing to do for the soul and in general it promotes the welfare of an individual, but more so than for ourselves I think we owe it to those things, the invisible things that seem to be only there when we take the time to stop and just be where we are, those things that are just naturally good at being. How sad would it be if those things actually existed but no one ever knew about them or took the time to find them. What are these things? They are ideas, they are metaphors, they are trees, they are angels, they are spirits, they are principles, they are truths. You might say from this vantage point reading along this narrative that there would indeed be another reality, finer and more fundamental than what is continually before our senses, but could in a way never be known or proven to exist.
For the most part I had the whole day to myself. I've been reading, sleeping, exploring and thinking. I wonder if you can tell.